双语 | 舒婷《秋天的情绪》

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秋天的情绪

Autumn Mood

舒婷

Shu Ting

因为是情绪，所以应是无迹可寻。

It’s a mood, so traces of it should not linger.

或许是缅怀一种逝去。在秋天里像叶子一样飘落的人和事？也可能是由于那飘落的人和事而感觉到秋意森然，又何必翻阅日历，是否已到秋分？

Perhaps it’s remembering a kind of past, of people and things fallen away like leaves in autumn? Or perhaps it’s because of those people, those events, that one feels the gloomy spread of autumn, why check the calendar to see if fall is here already?

死亡固然辉煌，活着较之愈显凶险暗淡。但生命必有它无可推诿的承担，之重？之轻？皆义无反顾。《托孤救孤》故事里那人说：“活下去难，引颈就义容易。兄弟，让我做这容易的，留下难的给你吧。”在这里，生和死才真像一把火。后人从最后一颗火星中读他们的微笑：死得慷慨无憾，活得悲壮怆然。

Death gleams convincingly; living seems by contrast bleak and fraught with danger. But life has its unevadable responsibilities. How heavy? How light? All are duty-binding. That person in the old story (Using One Orphan to Save Another) said, “To keep on living is hard, but sticking one’s neck out to get chopped is easy. Brothers, let me do the easy part, and leave the hard part to you.” Only here do life and death really seem like a fiery brand. Those to come will read their smiles in the last spark: they died with passion and without regret; they lived bearing up under tragedy.

死亡的足音旁过，一阵震颤过后我们也常常感到解脱之后骤然的轻松，以及终极的美丽如果真到了很远的地方，是否有快乐的声音传给你，我不知道。我料想，无论这里那里，快乐都是相对而言。

When Death’s footsteps pass, after a bout of shuddering we often feel the sudden lightness of release, so if the beauty of that endpoint really gets very distant, the sound of happiness may even reach you, I don’t know. I guess that, no matter here or there, happiness is relative.

美丽也是。

“Beauty is, too.”

我不惧怕死亡，但我不赞成试验。叶子飘落，就让它飘落吧，树脱去旧衣，它的根还紧紧抓住生之源，它的枝干依旧不屈不挠，即使在冬雪中。

I don’t dread death, but I don’t approve of experimentation. The leaves fall, let them fall. The trees cast off their old clothes, but their roots still grip the source of life; their branches do not yield even to the winter snow.

日落方向嫣红如梦，我们终将向它驰去。在这之前，让我们先完成那最难的生之旅吧。

The direction of the setting sun is a bright red, as alluring as a dream, and we will hasten there in the end. Before that, let us finish this most difficult journey through life.

（Carol R. Kaufmann 译）

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